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​Pastor Steve Littlefield of Simonton Community Church and I have known each other for 25 years.  He was my youth pastor in high school and has been my senior pastor ever since.  I consider him one of the wisest and most influential people in our community.  As a pastor, Steve has more experience with aging and dying and grief than most.  I was fortunate to have him by my side through both of my parents’ battles with cancer.  From waiting room conversations to quiet end-of-life chats with my family in our home, Steve has always offered consistent words of wisdom.  When my dad died, Steve gave me some of the best (and most memorable) advice I’ve ever heard.  He said “Remember, people will say dumb things.  They’ll say dumb things because they don’t know what else to say, and that’s okay.  Don’t worry about it.  They mean well.”  He was absolutely right.  Steve knows people, and I am honored to introduce you to him and his wealth of knowledge and excited to share our conversation on aging parents.

​​Laura Bracher and I worked together for two years at my previous job.  Our cubicles were in close proximity, so we saw each other daily and chatted often.  One morning, not long after I started my job, Laura flew in like a tornado- later than normal and a bit frazzled.  It was then I learned Laura was deep in the throes of caring for her parents, one of whom has severe dementia.  Three years later, she is still caring for her parents while juggling two teenage kiddos and a full-time job.  A few months ago, Laura unexpectedly lost her husband after his brief battle with cancer.  To say Laura has been through a lot is an understatement.  She is beyond tough, keeps a positive attitude and a friendly demeanor, and I am honored she agreed to speak with me about her role as a caregiver. 

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​With everyone still mostly cooped up due to the pandemic, I’m seeing more and more people frustrated from feeling trapped indoors.  In fact, right here in my own home, after almost a year of staying home, I find myself truly longing to escape to a solo retreat somewhere.  It’s not that I don’t love my roommate (who also happens to be my mother).  It’s just- the truth is, living with and caring for family members, especially elderly loved ones, requires an enormous amount of patience and compassion, and sharing spaces all day these days just seems to exacerbate this situation.  

​​One of my 25 tips for dealing with aging parents is to read the super-short book "Gone From My Sight".  The book, which is really more of a booklet, is literally 13 easy-to-read pages.  The subject within, however, is not an easy one.  This book is about the realities of death and what to expect from our loved ones during their last few months and through their final hours.